Thursday, October 11, 2012

The Missing Perspective

I should be writing a ditty on Ava for The Global Genes Project at this time, instead I am trying to wrap my head around some disturbing news my Colorado community is receiving today. There has been a sweet 10-year old girl missing since Friday, there is much speculation parts of her might have been found last night in an open space area in the NW metro area.

Yes, parts of her.

What kind of human does this? What circumstances brought them to an inkling of this nature? Who in the hell is his mother and what situation did she raise this individual in? Sweet Jesus, mother of psychotic dismembering nut-job, my heart breaks for you. I’m not sure I could ever fathom such heinous actions from my broods, or distant cousins for that matter. I am also aware you might have been Betty f*#king Crocker for whatever that’s worth.

I have an enormous amount of empathy for this missing girl’s mother (and family). The guilt that accompanies handing down compromised genes to your children is not justifiable but very real. I can only begin to imagine the guilt of a HARD WORKING MOTHER that missed a phone call from the school that her daughter hadn't made it, many hours later to find she is living this hell. A very real hell.

I have a bit of understanding of the delicately, mind numbing thoughts of all the potential “what if” scenarios continually racing through your mind. I’m just not sure how one deals with tragedy of this nature. If I could send Jessica’s mom a message of compassion and support it would be along these lines:

Forgive yourself; it was a typical morning in your life. Find a productive way to burn the fuel of grief that will steal your very soul, if you allow it. Hold onto your hope, even if it turns out your hope is that a butterfly will one-day flutter in your presence like only Jessica could; elegantly whispering sweet I Love You’s in your ear. Know that someday the sun will shine down on you again; that you will find a new & different happiness and embrace the gift of life you have with a ferocity that was an unimaginable part of your past. Know you are loved, absolved, and that it’s essential to your sweet daughter that you honor her life by not letting go of your own. Most of all, know you are not alone…grief can seem so isolating.

In light of this awful tragedy, today I welcome my daughter’s CDKL5 nemesis. Maybe I should most days. I am a fighter; I prefer to know my enemy and it took a fair fight to meet it. It saddens me not all are fortunate enough to have that chance.

Hug your loved ones, be kind to your neighbors, and gift the world with your smile every chance you get friends.

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